


Not What It Seems

by SlabMeatPunch



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series), Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Crossover, Gen, do yall want more?, more to come - Freeform, not ship but i guess interprit it however you like, probably, ryan is cecil, shane is carlos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-22
Updated: 2018-08-22
Packaged: 2019-07-01 05:12:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15767301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SlabMeatPunch/pseuds/SlabMeatPunch
Summary: Shane finds himself in the mysterious community of Night Vale where nothing works as it should and a short snarky radio show host narrarates everything





	Not What It Seems

**Author's Note:**

> This was fuelled by [this](https://hyperactive-lectiophile.tumblr.com/post/177259447785/i-need-a-buzzfeed-undolved-welcome-to-night-vale) post on Tumblr which I came across at 2 am and had to at least try to write. Hope you enjoy!

Ryan Bergara put on his headphones and sat down to talk soothingly to the people of Night Vale. Plenty had happened in the last two weeks. Plenty indeed. And the people needed to know about it, didn't they?

He pressed a button and watched the ON AIR sign above the doorway turn a glowing red. Pulling the microphone closer to his mouth, Ryan began. “A friendly desert community where the sun is hot, the moon is beautiful, and mysterious lights pass overhead while we all pretend to sleep. Welcome to Night Vale.”

-

Shane Madej was driving through a desert like any other he had driven through when, unlike during the other drives through other deserts, his radio came to life, suddenly and unexpectedly. A voice came from the radio, deep and oddly sultry, “Hello, listeners. To start things off, I’ve been asked to read this brief notice,” What came next only further baffled him. Dogs not allowed in the dog park? People not allowed in the dog park? Hooded figures?

The voice of the radio host left him with multitudes of questions and absolutely no answers. Right as the voice in the radio went on to talk about angels (a scientifically impossible things, Shane might add) he saw a small town come into view down the highway. No signs told him where he was arriving at, and checking the map, there shouldn't be anything there in the first place.

-

Ryan sat fascinated by the news presented to him in the form of a sealed letter giving to him by a nameless entity. The envelope was impossible to open but granted the host the information he needed through soft vibrations and a vision of a butterfly coming out of its cocoon. Ryan spoke again, “A new man came into town today. Who is he? What does he want from us? Why his perfect and beautiful haircut? Why his perfect and beautiful coat? He says he is a scientist. Well…we have all been scientists at one point or another in our lives,” He hoped the new man was listening in on today's broadcast.

-

Shane pulled off the highway and into the mysterious town. The lot he pulled into appeared to be the car lot spoken of earlier by the voice on the radio.

He was shocked when the same voice spoke about a man entering town which Shane could only assume was himself. “But why now? Why here?”

Certainly, he thought to himself, why indeed. Everything on the map said there should be no town right here along Route 800, not even a gas station or a rest stop. He had checked multiple times and still found no evidence on any map of a city right where there was so clearly now a city. “And just what does he plan to do with all those breakers and humming electrical instruments in that lab he’s renting – the one next to Big Rico’s Pizza?” Shane hadn't recalled renting any lab but looking at how the day was going it was entirely plausible he had and completely evident he would need it. He decided to seek out whoever was in charge of this strange community.

-

Ryan went on speaking about child safety and community news, peppering in his thoughts on the neighboring town of Desert Bluffs before he received another envelope with more information on this new man.

“That new scientist – we now know it’s named Shane – called a town meeting. He has a large head, and is probably descended from Bigfoot. His hair is perfect, and we all hate, and despair, and love that perfect hair in equal measure.” Ryan wished, despite knowing he had to do his job and serve the community, that he could be at the town meeting even if just to see the scientist himself.

“Shane told us that we are by far the most scientifically interesting community in the U.S., and he had come to study just what is going on around here,” Ryan looked at the next piece of news and shuddered slightly, worried about a man he had yet to know, “Government agents from a vague yet menacing agency were in the back, watching. I fear for Shane. I fear for Night Vale.”

-

Shane left the town meeting warily aware of the two men in suits that watched him exit. Getting back in his car the radio started up again, “I fear for anyone caught between what they know and what they don’t yet know that they don’t know,” He felt that this was probably directed at him, since most what he heard today on the radio was.

Shane let the radio drone on about a new waterfront recreation area while he sat wondering about this mysterious town he had found himself in. Wondering, mostly, about the radio host who seemed to be omnipresent and all knowing. Shane drove further through town, turning on a variety of scientific devices that should clue him into just what was going on in this community.

-

Ryan smiled, telling his listeners about ghost cars and mysterious lights when he heard a rap at his door. “And now, the weather.”

Ryan turned off the ON AIR sign above the door and opened it, glaring at the abnormally large man standing there.

“Can't you read?” Ryan asked annoyedly, “It says 'ON AIR’ right at your eye level. That's the radio equivalent of a sock on the door knob.”

The man, who he knew was the new scientist, Shane, merely pushed past him and pulled out a blinking box and waved it around. The more it beeped the more Shane's face contorted into an unattractive look of worry. Ryan glared and pushed Shane out of the door before turning the sign back on and continuing the broadcast. “Welcome back, listeners.”

-

Shane chuckled as he left the radio station. The amusement of that interaction was able to take his mind off the baffling readings he picked up for a short while. The voice of the man who had just pushed him out of his office came back on the radio seemingly without any annoyance that Shane had left him with, “The sun didn’t set at the correct time today, Shane reports. He’s quite certain about it,” Shane nodded, he was very certain about it, “Still, we must be grateful to have the sun at all. It’s easy to forget in this hot, hot, hot desert climate, but things would actually be slightly harder for us without the sun. The next time the sun rises, whatever time that turns out to be, take a moment to feel grateful for all the warmth and light and even, yes, extreme heat that our desert community is gifted with,” Shane continued to nod along.

-

Ryan finished his report on the underground city below lane five at the Desert Flower Bowling Alley and Arcade Fun Complex and tried not to let his tone change to annoyance as he spoke again, “Shane came into our studio during the break earlier but declined to stay for an interview. He had some sort of blinking box in his hand covered with wires and tubes.” He went on to talk about the chirping of the machine and the worry in his eyes that so greatly amused Ryan just ever so slightly. He signed off and sat back in his chair, today had been interesting.

-

Shane listened to the voice on the radio sign off, a soothing “Good night, Night Vale” and decided that he would be staying here for a little while longer, if only to continue to annoy the host of the public radio station. Shane realized that he had never gotten his name. Perhaps he could ask someone about it later.


End file.
